just call me nicola tesla*

One of Three yelled at me from upstairs while supposedly getting ready for school informed me the other day they were out of toothpaste:

One: MOOOOOOM!! I can’t BRUSH my TEETH!!


One: We’re OUT of TOOTHPASTE!!

Me: (wtaf) Um… go use MINE, FOOL SWEETIE.

One: … … Oh… OKAY. (damn)

Bugger thought she was gonna get away with that shit.


So, later that day, I’m at Target and actually have “toothpaste (kids)” on my list for once [yay me!] and toss in a bottle of ACT Kids BlahBlahBlah Rinse because the Collective’s dental hygiene needs all the help it can get is very important to me. End of story?

Not so much as you’d hope think.

This afternoon I was pouring myself a Good Belly & tequila [don’t judge: it was after 5pm local time, I SWEAR!/we were out of OJ/it’s surprisingly tasty/and possibly nutritious?] and thought, “Crap! Did I overpour again? You know what would be AWESOME: liquor bottles with little measuring thingies on top just like the Collective’s mouthwash!”

My genius knows no bounds, people.


Exhibit A. Scooby Doo just makes it MOAR awesome.

*Because I, too, will end up not getting credit for this revolutionary invention.


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